Tactical Pooper


I hope one day he will become a writer. Not because I think being a writer makes you special or worthy, but because I really like what he has to say and the way he says it.

Pole Theatre 2016: Why I Host


The most important thing to report is that I TOOK A LAP DANCE CLASS WITH STEVEN RETCHLESS!

Stress Balls


“Not going to happen Mom,” said scratchy just 30 seconds before the fucking thing exploded all over the floor. The next one exploded at the park so I only had to get the glue and food coloring out of Itchy’s clothes and GOOD NEWS at least it was partly made of out laundry detergent.

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year


… when Christmas is over. People, I tried. (If you haven’t already gathered, I wrote this a week ago but was too lazy to post it.) I tried super hard to be all Christmassy and I think I might have even kinda sorta pulled it off as far as my kids are concerned. However, I’m […]

Creamy Vegan Cauliflower and Chickpea Soup


I heard a disturbing article on NPR this morning about how global warming may lead to faster growing plants that are less nutrient dense. The big solution is to curb global warming by cutting CO2 emissions (goodbye coal and gasoline, hello solar) and the  smaller problem of nutrition in my home is to eat more […]

Kitten Pie (6426-6434)


I have wanted a kitten, like, forever. Yes, we had Frank the cat, but he was strictly devoted to Lonny and anyone who walked by the house but he wouldn’t give me or the kids the time of day. He saw housemates come and go, suffered other cats and a few dogs, but Blue was […]

Crushing on Blue (6368-6391)


I’m writing a love letter to my dog because I can’t spend all day fucking around with my blog. I did that yesterday and got exactly no love for my efforts, and I honestly thought I was being funny. I mean, what could be funnier than an extended navel gazing at my drunk deep thoughts? […]