It was 4am and I was just closing the lid on my coffee cup when I got Sideboob’s text that she just pulled up to my house. I kissed Chief goodbye, grabbed my bag and got in her car. We both let out a collective sigh of relief. We both needed this trip in the worst way.
My bathroom is not large by any means, and all I could think at the time was, WHERE ARE THE CATS? WHY AREN’T THEY IN HERE, TOO?
Tuesday is my favorite day of the week because it’s when Dan Savage drops his most recent episode of the Savage Lovecast. I love sharing podcasts with likeminded friends, I consider it a type of free-form bookclub. It turns out that Junebug is also a major podcast junkie, I’ve turned her onto my favorites and […]
This afternoon, whilst attempting to put dinner on the table, I was engaging in two of my favorite pastimes: text yelling at My Parasitic twin while also text yelling at her husband. It was some varsity level millennial shit. Who says you can’t teach an old dog new tricks? First MPT and I were text […]
Her power to burst my bubble transcends space and time.
I will spare you the gruesome details but let’s just say it was fucking gross. When I pulled out my phone BEFORE THE PROCEDURE my vet said, “You aren’t going to video this are you?!?”
The Renaissance Festival is walking into the equivalent of a strip club for kids and LARPers. If you ain’t throwing down the bills you ain’t having fun.
I felt the pervasive loneliness of my youth, desperation for love and barring that, pretty much any kind of companionship.
I promise it won’t be a 24-Hour Pity Party, just the usual stuff on my mind, most of which is stupid but makes me happy to put into words.
Sing it with me, Bain de Soleil for the Saint Tropez taaaaaannnnnn.