Her power to burst my bubble transcends space and time.
I will spare you the gruesome details but let’s just say it was fucking gross. When I pulled out my phone BEFORE THE PROCEDURE my vet said, “You aren’t going to video this are you?!?”
I feel like it is still best that I run my hobbies on a “better to ask for forgiveness rather than permission” basis and just fucking go for it while Loony is at work. Or out of town.
This time Sideboob was all drunk like, “I should text my husband!” and for once I got to slap the phone out of her hand and be all, “Yeah no. Texting your husband at 2AM from Jumbo’s would be a dick move” Yay me!
Lately I’ve been more into doing things than writing about them. The breakneck pace I’ve been keeping since June has finally come to a halt and I can focus my energies inward rather than getting ready for the next big trip/event/guest. I am grateful for all my experiences and wouldn’t miss seeing my guests for […]
I told her to abandon her feminist ideals about accurately portraying the female form and make me skinnier with bigger tits.
At then end of the day when I’m hot and sticky and desperately in need of a cold shower, it feels like summer can’t be over soon enough.
I was like, “HA! BOOBS!” and my kid was like, “Huh? What? Where?” and I pointed out the sticker and he was like, “That’s a face,” and I was like, “Yep, definitely not hitting puberty yet.”
I have some misgivings about sharing this next part because it might just cross a line but that just means I absolutely must share it. Come what may.
I usually argue with Loony about the most trife shit but I back down immediately when it comes to directions. Let’s just say that he’s more likely to guess how to get around a city he’s completely unfamiliar with than me, even if I was born and raised there.