Tempt Asian

I told her to abandon her feminist ideals about accurately portraying the female form and make me skinnier with bigger tits.

Not Suitable for Public Consumption

I was all super porny like, “Uhn. Baby, I love it when you talk that way.”

Everyone Says I Need More Cock

… except Loony but who cares what he thinks. Yesterday my phone blew up with people texting me pictures and videos of this bad motherfucker. Yes, I went there with the penis reference. OF COURSE I WENT THERE! WHEN DO I NOT GO THERE? I’m not alone. and … I love how supportive my community […]

Incident at Trader Joe’s

Someone would come to the door and he’d let it swing open slowly and say, “Sure is dark on that porch. Ain’t you afraid of getting jumped?” Then when the person stuttered a reply, “Speak up boy! What the hell is wrong with you? Ain’t you never seen a black man before?”

Blood Sucking Vampires and Cannibal Chickens

We have some problems with the other flock pecking at each other so now when the Silkies go to the Coop du Jour to range during the day, Annabel the Cannibal goes to solitary confinement at the Poulet Rouge until her Pinless Peepers arrive.

A Nuisance of Cats

I present to you Le Coop Du Jour. Like soup du jour but with a coop. That’s French for coop of the day because they use it during the day. And coop rhymes with soup. Get it?

Did I Say Rooster?

I also thought that Radish’s passing would be a good opportunity to get an honest feel for how my neighbors actually felt about his incessant crowing.

Last Drunk Post of the Year

A Bat Mitzvah was the perfect thing for me to do on NYE and still be able to be in bed and/or drunk posting by 9:00.