T*tty P*ssy F*ck


I was like, “HA! BOOBS!” and my kid was like, “Huh? What? Where?” and I pointed out the sticker and he was like, “That’s a face,” and I was like, “Yep, definitely not hitting puberty yet.”

Potty Talk


Most parents (or child-care involved people) will know about the potty talk phase. It’s when kids are obsessed with bodily functions. It usually subsides after about a year of telling them to knock it off but it has only gotten worse. Not my kids. Me. For a while I appeared to be obsessed with writing […]

I Am Not Here To Make Friends


Ranee (who doesn’t have a pseudonym yet) had twins – with a toddler already knocking around – and after a over a year in the k-hole, she re-emerged into my life … and with a mission. Dude, I used commas, parenthesis, and ellipses in one sentence. That has to be some kind of crime against […]