I was super tired yesterday. Perhaps it was the lingering effects of the bivalent Covid booster and flu shot combo, but the net of it was that I hauled myself and the dogs to my loft at 6pm and was fast asleep not long after.
I love our drives. We do them every Sunday and I walk away full of love and gratitude for my relationship with my kids. I also am becoming a Kanye fan. Well, maybe not a “fan” but I’m seeing why he is so famous, public mental health crisis notwithstanding.
But really, who hasn’t had one of those? We just aren’t famous enough for people to notice or care.
My mental health is good these days. Everything feels stable and somewhat predictable. My anxiety is on low. I owe it to a lot of things but I can’t emphasize enough how much my sweetheart helps me.
It’s not that he holds me together, I can do that, I have just learned how to address things as they arise rather than letting them stew. And I don’t fear talking about things to him, I don’t worry that this will be the last straw, the thing that breaks us. I know that we will emerge closer and happier.
Anywhoo, It didn’t hurt that the conditions were absolutely ideal for sleeping last night. Regard …
Perhaps as a result or not, I was gifted with a wonderful dream.
And for those of you who need more time and want it bigger.
You know how when you adjust your focus just so you see little “floaters” in your field of vision? Like translucent little specks and sometimes a tiny strand? The fish above me were translucent like that. I swear it was like being in a Miyazaki film.
I woke up around 3am – because I’d been asleep for 15 hours – and managed to go back to sleep and I dreamt I was lost on campus with a dog off leash and clothes that were falling off me and I ended up in a packed classroom and realized that guy next to me that I had been joking with about how boring this shit is got up and (of course) was the professor and Brad Pitt was with me and was like, “We should just leave, he won’t care,” but even though I wasn’t enrolled in the class I felt like it would be rude to go but I still really wanted to get home but I could only access my dorm room by crossing one road which was on a super busy street that’s light only turned once a day for 45 seconds and I did t know when that was or even how to fry to that crosswalk. Mike Malone was there, too.
But Brad Pitt was in my dream so I’m filing this anxiety masterpiece in the “sexy” category.