Love in the Time of Corona: Week 15

Another major holiday has come and gone during this strange time. Strange because of social distancing and pandemic, but also strange because we are celebrating independence at a time when Americans are called to reckon with the gross injustice that our country was built upon.

Hardly anything seems uncontroversial these days. And that’s okay.

Although I don’t think anyone would object to a statue of Dolly, an American treasure

I didn’t mind doing without the fireworks. The fireworks I loved the most was when I was 19 and having a summer fling with a much older man, Jon Seegmiller – or Seegfucker – as my bestie liked to call him. We drove to Grand Junction to see Marcia and watched the fireworks from her front porch. It wasn’t that I was particularly in love with him or anything, I just remember being really impressed with the show.

I invited myself up to Jason and Emily’s for a BBQ, promising to bring all the food (which I did) and Lonny made delicious Key Lime bars. Jason and Emily are family, there are few people I feel so comfortable with. Our friendship is invaluable and I would do anything for them, as I know they would do anything for me and my family.

Hanging out with them on their mountain property was beautiful.

I don’t want to jinx it but I think my boys are starting to get along better. I spent the better part of today and yesterday overhauling Scratchy’s room. It’s so fucking gross in there … old dishes, food wrappers, dust bunnies, dirty laundry, and junk everywhere.

I did a big overhaul six months ago and I think that, like me, it needs to be addressed twice a year. As much I would like to never be involved in his room, he needs a little help establishing a regular purging and reset routine. At least I’m hoping that’s how this will turn out. So I moved his secretary desk to the room I’m staying in and got rid of a couch that we’ve had about 13 years but is still in good shape, there’s just no room for it.

Thank you for your service

It was a big job to move all the furniture, clean and purge. And Itchy helped out a bunch. He was surprisingly generous and helpful and I found him playing Magic with his brother and Uly this evening.

He used to eschew Scratchy’s friends for being “too young and annoying” but these days I see him participating more with them. I think this newfound equanimity has something to do with their ages equalizing and his desire to interact with people who aren’t me. Scratchy has been very proactive about maintaining friendships through the pandemic and I think Itchy wants a piece of that action. It makes me happy to see them get along.

I need to give Itchy a little of that mama love, although his room doesn’t need it as much, but I can tell he’d like some attention. After that I need to do “my” room. I’m going to be here for a bit, I may as well make it a space I enjoy being in.

This clown must go.

To that end I finally asked Junebug if I could buy one of her prints. My favorite print.

In a non-creepy way I told her I’d rather look at her butt than a clown.

I’d like to re-wallpaper the room but I’m not sure how much time, effort, and money I want to put into Lonny’s house.

Anyway, after the bbq, I went to Fort Collins to see BF. Itchy called me to say that neighbors bought a box of fireworks and they lit them in the alley. He said it was the most fun 4th of July he’s ever had, way more fun than waiting on the porch for the fireworks to go off.


There were plenty of homegrown displays in BF’s neighborhood. I was rather delighted by how we could see them from the bedroom window. You know who wasn’t impressed?

Chief was impossible. The fireworks completely freaked him out and he simply would not sleep in his bed or by my legs. He had to sleep with his head on mine. It wasn’t a great night for sleeping.

I took the boys to Fort Collins for some inner tubing down the Poudre River. The water was low but they enjoyed themselves.

We got catfish for lunch and then knocked around Old Town until it was time to catch the shuttle to Boulder.

It was so hot that we got iced teas and hung out in the shade while watching little kids play in the pop jets.

One kid was super into whatever narrative he had playing out in his head. He was absolutely focused on destroying water jets with karate chops and kicks. I think it was Scratchy that said, “Who needs a phone when you can watch kids play?” So cute.

Nachos after driving

I’ve been enjoying my daily drives with Itchy. It’s this perfectly regular activity where we drive around and talk. I really love it. And I’m making it up to Scratchy by taking him on a daily walk to 7-11 to get Slurpees. I feel like I’m finally finding some balance with them. They both seem happy and contented.

Itchy was helping me get my house ready for my new tenants and returned to the house from taking out the trash to tell me that he thinks he may have killed baby rabbit by accident.

He opened the gate to the side yard and saw this bunny lying there on the ground, still warm but dead. Perhaps the gate opened over the dear thing. I picked it up and encouraged him to examine it. It’s not often one gets to touch a tiny rabbit. He declined but I took some time with it. Poor thing.

I still haven’t found time to do any pottery but I’m feeling more on top of being a summer mom. There’s lots of cooking and cleaning and driving but I’m happy doing it. Kinda. I don’t love it when they blow up the kitchen.

It never ends.

My stand-up paddle boards arrived this week. BF and I took them out for a spin.

Inflating the boards

It was such a fun morning and Chief did surprisingly well riding on the back once he realized it wasn’t worth it to jump ship.

He can’t decide who he wants to be with
Risking $150 fines for cliff jumping

We left around 1pm when the clouds started rolling in. We had lunch on the empty patio at Avogadro’s Number and then went back home where I enjoyed the breeze and shade.

BF got burnt to a crisp. Honestly, I’ve never seen anyone turn so red. Before I realized how serious it was, I made up a jokey headline.

Area Lawyer Sustains 3rd Degree Burns on 80% of His Body

Also, he has the cutest bum on the planet

One of our previous Fryehouse roommates texted to see if I was in Boulder to hang out. I just happened to be and it was on the one day in the next 10 months that my house was available, seeing as how it was the day between one guest and another.

He’s been nursing a broken heart and I’ve been sending him texts and the relationship quotes that helped me through a hard time. I love it that he thinks of me as a mom.

When I took Itchy to the DMV to get his learner’s permit, I realized I forgot my wallet. A young woman offered to pay his fee and I could Venmo her the funds. It was such a kind and generous offer. She said, “You remind me of my mom so I wanted to help.”

I guess I look like a mom, or at least I have mom energy. There are worse things for sure. Then I got into a nice text convo with Waeli, aka My Asian Daughter. She taught pole at the studio I invested in and I loved taking her classes. She was so mean and demanding! I wrote her a great letter of recommendation for grad school and she got in. Now she’s using her newly minted MFA as a professor of dance in Iowa.

Sometimes she calls me crying. Sometimes I call her crying. I adore her.

We are this to each other.

I also spent an hour on the phone with Màrion Crampe in Girona, and another hour with Steven Retchless in Puerto Vallarta. These friendships are so deeply nourishing and loving. I am glad for my five hours of driving because it gives me to opportunity to catch up with my beloveds.

Another long-distance relationship I have is with Aida. I’ve never met her, I have no idea why or when we started following each other on IG. But she’s given me dating advice and virtually held my hand when I went in for standard STI screenings and was mortified to realize that my NP was a rather attractive man.

She and I texted madly when he was out of the room and she had me in stitches.

She finished her nursing degree just in time for Corona. It has been a nightmare for her.

She’s so young and I’m watching her get traumatized over and over again. People, wear your masks.

I came across this the other day. I’ve pretty much been singing it to myself on repeat.

The combination of great lyrics, basic girls, and dead eyes really cracks me up

Here are the dogs looking cute …

I was talking to My Parasitic Twin on the way to the grocery store and she told me she forgot to put tampons on her Instacart order. Being the good friend I am, I picked a box up for her and delivered it to her porch.

WIth love

This morning I went over to Junebug’s new place. She rented the CUTEST little house with her partner.

The dogs were super happy to see each other but refused to be cute for the cameras.

We can’t help but try.

That’s it for this week. I hope you are all staying safe.

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