If you’ve been following my blog for more than a year, you’ve been through the divestment process with me.
You were there while I sold, donated, gifted, recycled and tossed over 7300 items in one year.
The end was bittersweet. I doubled my original goal of chucking ten items a day for 365 days and I walked away having truly grown as a person. But the awful, embarrassing, disappointing, shameful truth was that my house didn’t look any different.
You see, I don’t live alone.
I carved out a space for myself in Loony’s former eBay room (which was great) only to have all the stuff scattered around my old office/guest-room, dining room and sun room. That was November 2013.
Since then I’ve been walking around with blinders on.
I try not to look at the piles of
shit merchandise everywhere and focus on how great Loony’s business is doing.
Wouldn’t I rather put up with no dining room, no guest room and no play room for the kids than get another job or have Loony work a job that took him away from the home?
I try to always look on the bright side.
A year of that kind of denial wears on a person and our confrontations got more and more heated.
I was faster to slip into full panic attack mode when trying to explain to him how deeply this troubles me and our conversations often ended with me gasping for breath and him at a loss for how to resolve it.
What’s some stuff everywhere, you ask?
It’s been like this for almost a year.
I guess this might not seem like a big deal to some and I admit that this is a first-world problem, but whatever, I live in the first-world and am PSYCHED about it.
But if you know me and know how much I love visual order and appreciate beauty, you’ll know that living like a pack rat is way out of my comfort zone.
I love Loony so ditching the husband wasn’t the answer and Loony’s business is going gangbusters, which is great! I’ve been
nagging encouraging him to grow it.
He’s been selling so much each day that it often takes an entire day to hunt down and ship all his items. Our living room is completely covered with packages to send out. Seven days-a-week.
This is both exciting and frustrating; exciting because it means we’re making $$$ but frustrating because you can train someone to do the shipping but not many people buy a pair of vintage Converse for $5 at a garage sale and turn around and sell them for $800.
Unlike most of my posts where I just complain endlessly, after complaining endlessly to Tabby on our walks, I am thrilled to announce that there are developments!
After a couple false leads, Loony found a warehouse, we pulled the trigger and we are moving his business out of the house!
It’s 1400 square feet and Loony scored 48 linear feet of 4-feet deep shelving units. It has an office, wi-fi and tons of space.
My dad and step-mom were coming to town for Testiclese’s birthday and all I wanted was to sit down at our dining room table for a family dinner.
It wasn’t going to happen by itself which is where Shé comes in.
In six hours she sorted, bagged and moved everything into the van for Loony to take to the warehouse, then she organized the sun room, threw things out, and this is what I got.
Have you heard of an organizationgasm? If not, I’m sure you can figure it out.
Seriously, I couldn’t have been more turned on if she had been wearing tiny panties and a cute bra, but I’m not going to rule that out.
This is me ever since only I’m not faking it.
The guest room is still packed but she’s coming back next week to move it all and set up a shipping area in the new warehouse.
Loony is hiring The Tiny One to be his shipping manager, Minion and Moneypenny will photograph and list, and Shé will come in once a week to keep things organized and tackle the big project of moving items from his semi truck container into the warehouse for sorting, selling, or writing off.
Eventually I want to trim all the fat from his inventory so we can move into a smaller and cheaper space while maximizing his productivity.
After watching him move at lightning speed for Shé, I realized that I am not the person to help him. We have too much of the husband/wife dynamic keeping us from effectively working together. I realized that our marriage needs a unicorn.
An organizational Unicorn.
Shé is cheerful and energetic and can talk him into trying her ideas because she doesn’t have my shitty fed-up delivery. She hasn’t argued with him for years and therefore he can hear her ideas without feeling like he’s somehow backing down or being criticized.
And she’s adorable and almost impossible to say no to. She works twice as fast as I do and I’m a pretty fast worker. So we’re keeping her as long as she’s willing to be our business Unicorn.
So I got to have my family visit and not feel embarrassed and apologetic (not that they care about what my house looks like, but still) and not feel like I’ve become that person who complains endlessly but never changes a damn thing.
Even the kids were psyched to see the changes. They missed having a place where they could play.
We enjoyed Testiclese’s birthday dinner with all of us sitting down (rather than me and Loony standing around the kitchen island) and having a good laugh when he couldn’t blow out his trick birthday candles.
My family is so supportive of me. They were just as excited about the changes as I am and to celebrate they bought me these dope boots from Two Sole Sisters. But first I had to choose.
I try not to walk into that store because I WANT EVERYTHING so I save it for when my dad and MAC feel like indulging my shoe fetish.
Never in my youth would I have dreamt of having such beautiful and expensive footwear.
Thank you, Dad and MAC!
I’m committed to keeping this up. I want the kids to get into the habit of putting away their toys which ought to be easier now that there are LESS of them and I want to break Loony of his habit of dumping new acquisitions onto the dinner table.
I’m going to enjoy basking in the afterglow and look forward to more big changes in my house and life.
Thanks for reading!