There was a good deal of interest in my last blog post about living with a pathological liar (5 comments! Woot!) and I realized that I didn’t talk much about the resolution.
John and Anna cleared out within a couple weeks of the confrontation. I heard from Jefé that Anna said she was glad to go, that she’d lived with people with personality disorders before and it was clear that I had one.
This was excellent news. My biggest fear was that she would dump John and he would blame me for ruining his life.
As it stood, he convinced her that I was the crazy one and that they were lucky to get out.
I was happy to don the mantle of insanity, delighted in fact, if it meant that they would leave quietly.
I never heard from Anna after that, although Facebook recommends her as a friend from time to time.
Oh the irony.
It was perhaps a year later when John showed up at our door again. He was homeless and had gained a lot of weight, most likely because he no longer had Anna supporting him and whatever substance addiction he had going on.
Remember how he was always wired and never ate?
He brought with him another homeless man. I have no idea why he thought that was a good idea.
I asked if I could get them anything and he very eagerly responded, “Yes! Please! Anything you have!”
My generosity ran out a long time ago. I gave him a glass of water and listened to what he had to say.
(Lonny made sure he was aware of all the homeless and mental health services offered by the city of Boulder.)
He said he wanted to apologize, that he hurt a lot of people and was making the rounds of reconnecting with those he lied to.
Anna broke up with him (no big surprise) and his family was done helping him. He was trying to get back on his feet.
I told him that I forgave him and was sympathetic but it was time for him to leave. Fortunately I never saw him after that.
I worried for a time that he might be back and with more of his new friends but thankfully he moved on.
I hope he’s okay. I hope he got his act together and sought help for his compulsions. I’m glad that Loony was right and he wasn’t a violent or bad person, just a terribly sad, lonely and misguided one.