Today I was walking Blue and minding my own business when I came upon a tree that was blown over during a recent windstorm.
It took out part of a fence but I was more curious about a rather sizable chunk of honeycomb that had been dislodged.
Lonny and I used to keep bees until they swarmed and took up residence in a hollow tree down the street.
We’ve tried on several occasions to replace our hive but never with success.
I saw someone who looked like the owner of the house and asked him if he has contacted the local beekeeper association who could try to capture and relocate the hive.
I’m concerned about bees. I think they are divine.
He assured me that he’s looking after the bees and that someone is coming to rescue the hive this afternoon. That’s great! Oh and, sorry about your fence.
That’s when this other guy who was sitting on a scooter said, “And I’m sorry about your horse. It’s too bad you have to muzzle him.”
My horse? Har. I’ve never heard that one before.
But muzzle? What? He must be talking about Blue’s Halti head lead. It’s an honest mistake.
“That’s not a muzzle, that’s a head leader and it helps me maintain control if he gets too excited about a squirrel because he’s kind of big.”
But we know that.
“Don’t worry, he can still bite you if you want him to.” (wink)
He said, “I hear Great Danes all have heart attacks at ten years of age and drop dead. They just give out.”
Why do people do that? People just love to tell me that my dog is gonna die. Soon. I am all too aware of his short lifespan. In fact, I am trying to forget about it.
I could have pointed out that the scooter he was sitting on made him 37% more likely to die in an accident than if he were driving a car.
BUT THAT WOULD BE RUDE, NOW WOULDN’T IT?
Nor would that change his mind about his scooter. He’d be about as likely to get rid of his scooter based upon my opinion than I would be to exchange Blue for a longer-lived dog.
I guess I could have the decency to be overwhelmed with regret.
Oh well. All I have to say to that guy is …
Also on my walk I saw a Lotus. I took a picture of it for the boys so they could see what a car that costs as much as a house looks like. I was impressed by how tiny it was and how its name rhymed with my first born’s.
Something tells me that Small Penis is not what the makers of Lotus had in mind when they branded it.
I’m pretty worn out from Lara Michael’s Flexibility workshop.
Last night’s show and the dance party that followed kept me up until 1AM. I performed at the Bohemian Biergarten’s KissKiss party with Moneypenny, The Norwegian Nanny and other dancers from Vertical Fusion who haven’t been given nicknames yet.
It was a great evening. It’s always a pleasure to perform for a fun and open crowd that treat us with respect. I was a little nervous about dancing in front of youngsters but it was so packed that I doubted anyone would be able to get a good look at my stretch marks.
Of course, once I got there, I stripped right down to my performance wear and had a grand old time. And I ran into an old friend!
Today I was happy to only have laundry, house cleaning and blogging on my list of things to do. I even
dumped dropped the boys off at Heather’s house while we enjoyed champagne and cheese on a friend’s roof.
He invited all of us but there was no way I was going to let my kids in his house.
I realize that I am bragging right now, but it was a really nice afternoon without kids on the roof.
I recently had a friend wail that having billionaire friends is making her feel insecure about her mere millions. I had a hard time working up any sympathy.
Me? I’m an opportunist. I’m more than happy to enjoy the fruits of my friends’ labor if they are so kind as to invite me over.
Do you have an amazing pool that costs more than my net worth? That’s great! I’m not going to feel insecure about it, but I might happen to have my swimsuit in my purse. Every time I come over. Quel bon surprise!
Thanks for the lovely afternoon, Chris!
Anyway, this is all great but … it’s time to cut the crap.
This is an otherwise boring video but it is kind of funny when Testiclese busted me for swearing.