Among all the other things that happened last week, it was also my son’s birthday. He’s a rather introverted child and wanted to have a small party of only his closest friends. Fine by me.

Of course, this being Boulder, land of the over-the-top parties he was like, “And I want a magician, that temporary tattoo guy, the man who brings the giant snake, a bouncy castle and Bongo the Balloon Man.”

HAHAHAHAHAHA. no.

I miss the days of birthday parties involving a cake, ice cream, and kids running all over the house, psyched to be hanging out together.

But no, somebody had to go and ruin it for everyone and start getting all competitive about birthday parties. I’ve been to some SICK kiddy birthday parties and I’ll be the first to say that I’m THRILLED to attend any of them. Seriously. Invite me. I’ll bring food.

But I’m not going to try to compete with it when it’s my turn.

This is the entertainment I got for Testiclese’s party.

But wait, there’s more. I admit that I fell for the slick photo on Pinterest of Chomping Monster Cookies.

Some cookies, frosting and candies. How hard can it be? Look how prepared I was! I’m AMAZING! How can you NOT create a masterpiece when you have this palette?

Well, let’s just say that six and seven year-olds are rather blunt instruments.

That’s not entirely fair, there were some masterpieces. However, the kids had a blast doing it which makes it a big success.

This is the desired outcome

Eyestalks rule!

We had some structural integrity issues.

That’s supposed to be purple, BTW.

More eyestalks

My favorite

I think an adult made this one. Or maybe not.

Time to cut the crap.

I only have two items but since I have almost doubled my original purging goal and I can’t find Lonny anywhere to get approval to go in the basement, this will have to be it for the the day.

The boys are out of board books and this “It’s Ok to Be Smart” seems like a good idea and everything, but really? Isn’t that what school is for? Between school and tutoring and forcing them to watch documentaries, they make themselves scarce when I whip out flashcards. DONATE.