Omens of Great Portent (5520-5589)

I knew that today was going to be awesome from the moment I cracked open the egg for the boys’ breakfast.


It’s a double yolker and from one of the new girls! I wasn’t expecting it because it was a white egg and I’m prejudiced against white eggs. I’m a reverse racist when it comes to eggs. But people can change!


In my heart I truly believe that blue and pink and brown eggs are superior, but my Leghorn proved me wrong. Woot!

It set the stage perfectly for the most excellent message on my phone. My insurance agent called to tell me that she accidentally dropped a discount we qualified for. As a result, I have about $1000 in refunds coming in the mail. Woot, woot!

She left her number just in case I had any questions. Naturally I called her immediately.

“State Farm Insurance, this is Kristen.”



“I love you.”


“This is Vivienne! I got your message about the refund.”

“Oh my God. I really needed to hear that! I’ve had the worst day. Thank you!”

“No … Thank You!”

Sometimes things work out for everyone.

Then my son came home with this head scratcher in his homework folder.


Me: Hey Testiclese. What’s this a picture of?

Testiclese: It’s two monsters standing on a rock.

Me: Is that a pole on the rock?

Testiclese: (sigh) No.

Me: Are you sure? Because it looks like they are pole dancing.

Testiclese: No mom. It’s a rock hanging from a rope. Duh.

Just once I wish my boys would take an interest in the things I do. Time to cut the crap.

18 thoughts on “Omens of Great Portent (5520-5589)

  1. I’ve never in my life experienced a double yoker in person. And we were getting 12 eggs everyday over the summer – WTF! You have all the luck! I’m racist again white eggs too. So boring.

    • I was thinking about you guys. I can’t wait for the big day! Coming soon! You need new layers to get double yolkers. Once the ladies mature into laying, they become more regular and boring. I yelled at Lonny today because he inadvertently cracked open a double without my permission. Grr.

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