I have really been putting my back into this summer vacation thing. I’ve caught myself gushing to other moms about how great summer is! And how fantastic it is to not have the boys in camp! We can wake up when we want! I don’t have to worry about packing lunches or getting anywhere on time! It’s soooo relaxing! I wish it would never end!
And then my meds/buzz wore off and I turned into a ball of impotent rage as the cumulative anxiety of all the shit that I need to do but haven’t had time to do piles up on me.
My office is so full of shit to do that I’ve closed the door on it and walked away. Which is why I blog from the bathroom. And that bookkeeper that I thought I hired before school got out is MIA. I keep sending her receipts and I haven’t heard from her. Not once. In three months! It’s time to face reality, she doesn’t want to do my books.
I have simple goals for the summer:
- Get the kids outside at least two hours a day
- Get them to read at least 30 minutes a day
- Feed them at least twice, preferably something fresh
- Avoid electronic entertainment
- Prevent them from re-entering the school year stupider, fatter and lazier than they were when school got out
- Not give up on blogging altogether
I’m dreaming large here, people. I’ll admit to lying face down on my bed on at least one occasion and telling them (to their great delight) to, “Just eat a friggin’ bowl of cereal for dinner,” and I have looked the other way when they holed up in a pillow fort with the iPad watching vintage Loony Toons. There has to be at least a little of that in the summer, right?
Anyway, I was extra special this week and arranged to meet other kids at the Boulder Creek for all-day outdoor good times. We rolled into the homestead around 3 or 4 o’clock each day where I fed them first dinner, then second dinner, tried to bang out a blog post (my quality has taken a nosedive) and find a few things to chuck out the door. Most nights the little biters would outlast me.
I can’t tell you how excited I am to have them in camp this week. Unfortunately it isn’t in Boulder which means it’s about an hour round trip to drop them off and pick them up, if I try to make it back home. Instead, I’m going to set up shop in a nearby café and study (i.e. fuck around on the internet) to be a personal trainer.
I know, I know. But I got a Groupon! I’ve lifted weights for so many years and logged endless hours in the weight room, I figure I might as well go the extra mile and get a certification. Why not?
Time to cut the crap.
Tiny car. DONATE
Books that I read and will never read again, or have never read and likely will not ever read. SELL/DONATE.