Today was a really good day, blog-wise and purging-wise.
TeenyBikini who writes The Jigglybits, one of my favorite blogs, was so kind as to link to me in her latest masterpiece about Lifting Her Dainty Vagina and peeing in the sink because of construction delays. I admit to being guilty of doing the same, but I blame childbirth for my inability to wait my turn when it’s time to go. You know what they say about desperate times.
I give her kudos for building a blog around that topic. I still have much to learn.
Perhaps it was because of the link that my blog blew up. Blowing up means I got ten new followers, which is my best day ever since I was written up in the paper. You should check it out, if for no other reason than to see the worst picture ever taken of me (no joke, I look like a zombie in pancake make-up. I knew that photographer was going to fuck me over) and read some really nasty comments by on-line trolls. People are really mean.
I got a nifty WordPress app that alerts me when I get a comment, like or follow and I actually started to get annoyed with my phone. Then I reminded myself that it might be another year before I get this much traffic in one day so I should enjoy the moment.
Blogging is such a strange thing. Unless you are one of the lucky ones, you are doing it for free. I do it because I love writing. I love organizing my thoughts and making something out of the events of the day, or at least the contents of my brain. I also love my followers. I can’t believe anyone actually looks forward to my blogs. Hi Melissa! Hi Delin!
My only regret is that I got into the habit of posting every morning at 6am. If I don’t have something up exactly on time, I get emails asking WTF? and am I dead or something? I should have set 9am as the precedent.
Today I woke up in a foul mood, of course. Sometimes I just beez that way. Maybe it was because the dog woke me up at 2am to go tinkle and it took me an hour and a half to get back to sleep. Maybe it was because the people staying on our second floor were Getting It On in the shower at midnight.
I was inclined to be irritated but when I met them the following day and they were all middle aged and normal looking, I thought, “You go! Woot!” I like knowing that normal people can be all freaky.
Shawn came by to do all the things around the house that have been bugging me and that Zeb simply doesn’t have the time to do. Shawn banged out my list lickety-split and is coming back tomorrow to get the rest done. I swear, he works fast.
Did I ever tell you that effectiveness is a powerful aphrodisiac? Just sayin’.
Rachel showed up and I just can’t stay in a bad mood with her around. I busted out the tequila and she went crazy on my deck. I’ve been feeling down about my project. For as much as I’ve gotten rid of, there are times when I feel like I can’t tell the difference.
Rachel jumped right in there and was able to say, “This corner looks like crap but if you moved that bench (SHAWN, GET OVER HERE AND TAKE THIS BENCH UP TO THE SECOND FLOOR!) and got rid of that bucket, it would be beautiful.” And then she did it.
It looked even shittier, but Rachel moves so fast that I actually had to reconstruct the before pictures. I didn’t have the heart to ask Shawn to bring the bench back down.
She says I need a nice pot of flowers to give it a “woman’s touch”.
We done wore out the welcome mat. I’m replacing it with a runner.
Then she took the young rooster back with her to the Springs. She dropped him off a few months ago thinking he was a hen. That is no hen. She actually needed another rooster (to put in her belly!) so she saved me the hassle of geeking him myself.
The old lock on the door that doesn’t work. I bought a new one weeks ago but Shawn finally put it in today. Can I tell you how happy I am about this? Scrotus said, “Can you make the code 438257867 and 1/2?” Sure. I’m not sure what to do with the lock, it’s a lot of metal and would be good to recycle.
Stupid, shitty toys. TRASH.
This was a cute little casserole but the color got ruined in the dishwasher and a ramekin. R-A-M-E-K-I-N. Ramekin, ramekin, ramekin. I think I’ll drop the RAMEKIN off at Al’s house.
More Melmac stuff. DONATE.
I set these bitchin’ iron knives aside to get rid of a while ago (so I’m not counting them again). I’m giving them to Shawn and he’s killing two birds with one stone for me.
Thanks Shawn and Rachel! You saved my life (and Zeb’s) today! I’m gonna make you a dinner with no onions!
I LOVE going onto my porch again. I actually feel like a grown-up.