I have finally arrived as a blogger because I got my very first hater! Woot!
I got this lovely comment on my post about Lululemon’s CEO, Chip Wilson, being a total d-bag.
Apparently Yeah No really hates my hair. A lot. More than (s)he agrees or disagrees with my meditation on corporate PR suicide.
I have anticipated this moment from the second I started blogging. At some point someone is gonna hate what I do and they are gonna tell me.
But of all the things (s)he could hate about me, and there are many, why hate the hair?
I mean, sometimes I hate my hair, too.
Like, when I’ve got two more weeks until my appointment with Penny and I haven’t used any product and it’s all poofy and I’ve cut my bangs twice by myself and slept on it and I wonder if I just look old and ridiculous.
I hate my hair then.
I had a hard time finding these pictures, BTW, because I delete any picture of myself that I don’t love. Because I’m vain like that.
But then there are the times when I really love my hair, like here. And most of the time.
So Yeah No, point taken, and let my offer me thanks that you’ve preemptively yer welc’ed.
Now if I were to hate on myself, which I do all the fucking time, here’s what I would go to town on:
- My narcissistic blog is about stupid shit that doesn’t matter and is usually riddled with typos
- My stupid and uninformed opinions
- How I make a fool out of myself on a pole in tiny outfits …
- … with small children around (gasp!) What kind of horrible mother am I?
- How I abuse my cat by moving her litter situation around
- And how I abuse my employees by making them deal with her litter situation
- How I swear way too much and am setting a bad example for my kids (but I don’t swear around them … most of the time)
- How I dress inappropriately for my age
- How I post strange videos of my young friend’s butt all the time
- How I often wallow in self-pity
- How I take advantage of my hot Asian doctor friends by posting videos of them being hot either 1) pole dancing or 2) performing surgery
- How no one really gives a shit about what I think yet I insist on writing anyway
- How I spent a year cleaning out my house and, aside from inner peace, don’t have much else to show for it
- And speaking of, I’ve kinda been slacking on getting rid of stuff. Loser.
- Don’t forget I have a vicious dog
- I make fun of my friend Tabby for having an accent AND being skinny. I’m such a bitch.
- And what’s with my kids’ nicknames? How wrong is that?
- How I should be nicer to my husband, who I call Loony and that’s just mean
- And I post pictures of him in a stupid outfit
- And the list just goes on. And that’s just for people who don’t know me! I’m sure if you knew me you’d have hundreds more reasons why I suck. Maybe thousands if you are my ex-husband.
But you can hate my hair, if you really want.
I love this!
I was Googling hater memes and this one tickled the shit out of me. There’s nothing quite like multiple spelling errors to take all the wind out of your (not you’re) sails.
But I’m not gonna hate back. Yeah No has a right to his/her opinion.
As a gift to my hater (maybe haters, if I dare to dream) here is a totally gratuitous video of myself learning the Holly Drop at the studio. Feel free to hate on my feet. And my hair. And my technique.
You can’t hate on the music because I didn’t choose it. And if I were you, I wouldn’t pick a fight with the Norwegian Nanny. She’s very strong. And mean. Yer welc’.
Time to cut the crap.
Kids’ jeans. DONATE.